Narcissism and Its Discontents

In the current political and social environment narcissism has become a normalized social condition that often represents an affinity for financial and professional success. Not surprisingly, a lot of clients share stories with me of how a person with narcissist personality traits has negatively impacted their life. This often leads to questions of how to set healthy boundaries with these people, or how to decide whether or when to sever the relationship. Of course each person’s work is based on their individual context, but the following TedTalk (presented by the author of Should I Stay or Should I Go: Surviving a Relationship With a Narcissist) is a must watch!

A few of my favourite pieces:

“Narcissistic patterns undercut the core of what’s necessary for healthy relationships. These things include mutuality, respect, compassion, patience, genuineness, honesty, and trust – things that are simply not possible with a system or person that is narcissistic.”

“If someone is not willing to recognize that they need to make a change because they are hurting other people, there is little likelihood that they will change, but there IS likelihood that they will continue to blame other people, the world, or you for their bad behavior.”

“Start giving the best of ourselves to our healthy and reciprocal relationships and really only give the bare minimum to the relationships that aren’t helping us grow.”